Friday, June 29, 2012

Spotlight Blogger: Meet Nancy

Today we're featuring a fairly new to the blogging world blogger, Nancy.  She's the author of  "Letting go to take hold."  She's in reunion with the daughter she relinquished, and since I don't know that many birth moms with those stories, I was particularly excited to interview her.  Let's find out about Nancy....

First, please tell us a bit more about yourself (name, age, where you live, what led you to making an adoption plan, and anything else you feel comfortable sharing).

My name is Nancy and I am 46. I live in Illinois and have all my life. When I chose adoption I was a single mom to my son and living in a car. Looking back, it was the only decision that made sense. I did not want to be a mom living on public aide. I wanted more for my children and myself. I was given the choice by my mother either place the child I was carrying and move back home or continue living in the car I was living in. I don’t place the blame for the decision on my mom. I realized that by moving home with my son, this was placing a burden on my parents as well. My father was a full-fledged Parkinson's patient and I knew it would be difficult for him to have one baby underfoot. I knew he could not handle two.

When and why did you begin blogging?

I know this might sound strange, but I began writing when I reunited with my girl. Blogging actually began when I needed something positive to focus on. I am currently in the middle of a divorce and the one positive thing in my life is the adoption/reuniting with my girl and her family. Writing about the experience has helped me to focus on a beautiful part of my life. I also believe that if I share the experience, I may be able to educate others in the experience of adoption.

Tell us more about the title of your blog.  Why did you choose it?

When I first reunited I wrote the first entry “Letting Go To Take Hold”. Why I remembered this I have no clue. I never realized that this had stuck in my mind from my childhood. But, as I sat and wrote the first story the lesson from confirmation days came back in my mind and I couldn’t let it go. I had to include it.

Has the response to your posts been mostly positive, mostly negative, or a mix of both?

The responses have been positive. But, to be honest it has only been out there a short time. I have had negative face to face responses from those who don’t really understand adoption. I have found that by taking the time to explain my choice and the choices I could have made, usually helps others understand that the decision was made out of love. 

What post on your blog do you consider a “must read” for people visiting your blog for the first time? Or what post(s) from your blog is (or are) your favorite(s) and why?

I want to say all of them, but I think the one that was the most meaningful for me was THE DAY EVERYTHING CAME FULL CIRCLE. I remember writing this and actually reliving the day. I believe that this one shows the beauty of our adoption experience and how with faith and love, everything really does come full circle.

Do you have any advice for someone thinking of starting their own blog?

I have not been doing this long, but I would say to sit in a quiet place and write from the heart. Allow yourself the freedom to say what you would want to say about your child, yourself and your choices. If you have a relationship with your child, respect their wishes and the relationship with their family. I never include their names out of respect for them.  My girl has read the entries and is fine with what is written.

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