As a birth mother I have found there are many people who just
do not understand all that goes along with this title. Some people may disagree
with my choices, others may just not care. I believe there are people who just
do not care. These people may think we made a decision to make our lives
easier, and to them I say: “You have no idea!” I never know for sure the
reaction I will get when I drop this big “bombshell” on people that I have met.
I have a son who was placed for adoption when I was in high school. This is a
part of my life and a part of who I am. If you don’t like it, disagree, or don’t
care, then there is not a place for you in my life. This week I have chosen a
quote that can be my motto at times:
“Be who you are and
say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter
don’t mind.”
– Dr. Seuss
I know at times this can be difficult, especially if the people
who do not understand are people that are close to us. I have been blessed by
an amazing support group around me, who give me all their love and support.
However, for me, I believe if this was not the case I would feel just the same.
My life is too short, and my choices are too important to the person I am. If
someone does not understand these important choices I have made for my son’s
life, they cannot understand me. I agree, part of this “stubbornness” comes
from my personality, along with years of growing and a strength that has
developed because of my adoption story. I believe that all birth mothers deserve
to be honored for their decision, and anyone who does anything less doesn’t
deserve our fragile hearts or any of our emotions. There are people out there
who will understand and love us for that part of our lives and what it has
helped shape us into today. I know that I am proud to be a birth mom. I know I
would not be the same person today. So
be strong, be open and honest, and you will see those people who are there
for you!
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