Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Entrustment Ceremonies

As you are making an adoption plan, you may have heard the words “entrustment ceremony” but not really understand what it is or what it is all about. 

Entrustment ceremonies are becoming more common nowadays. Although, they are not for everyone. It’s something you should learn about and consider but not feel forced into doing it if it doesn’t feel comfortable to you. 

So, what exactly is an entrustment ceremony, you ask? An entrustment ceremony is an adoption ritual that acts as a symbolic gesture of the transferring of the parental role from the birthmother to the adoptive parents. Entrustment ceremonies can give a birthmother the chance to symbolically say goodbye and provide a little closure. There is no right or wrong way to hold an entrustment ceremony – it can be tailored to the needs and desires of the people involved.

An entrustment ceremony also can ease the transition period at the time the adoptive family takes the baby home. This works in two ways: the birthmother does not feel like she is abandoning her baby and is not left in limbo waiting for the final court date, and the adoptive family do not feel like they are “kidnapping” someone else’s child. Adoptive families also have less concern about the “finalization” legally, which is especially important in an open adoption as they will most likely feel less “threatened” by the birthmother, and it may be easier to welcome her into their lives sooner. 

An entrustment ceremony can also take the adoption process out of the legal system and into the hearts and minds of those participating, which is really what adoption is about in the first place.

The term entrustment ceremony sounds fancy but it doesn’t have to be. It could be something as simple as going around the room and saying how you feel or more elaborate with a clergy person present. You can choose to read a special poem aloud, play a meaningful song, or light a candle. Some adoptive parents and birth parents use the entrustment ceremony as a time to state your intentions, hopes, and desires for each others’ future. If a birthmother already has a child or children, they can participate in the ceremony as well by either just being present or perhaps giving the baby a special drawing or a letter.

For more information on entrustment ceremonies visit the Entrustment Ceremony page on BirthMom Buds. 

No comments:

Post a Comment