tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18367023828565958.post116166376277740601..comments2023-09-04T01:39:11.141-07:00Comments on BirthMom Buds Blog: Spotlight Blogger: Meet JillBirthMom Budshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16631346337722891976noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18367023828565958.post-8398283815031148462012-02-29T06:32:40.141-08:002012-02-29T06:32:40.141-08:00"And I firmly believe that my baby was meant ..."And I firmly believe that my baby was meant to be with her parents, and there's not a thing you or anyone else can say or do to convince me otherwise"<br /><br />First of all, I just want to say I had a perfectly happy adoption. I am unsure of the exact reasons my bmom placed me although I know she truly did what she felt was best at the time. However, being the flawed human being that I am and thus capable of paradoxical feelings (and flame me if you must), I would rather the only reason my bmom didn't raise me was because she had no other option (which is likely given the times) than if she was capable of parenting but chose adoption over parenting. <br /><br />I did read your blog and I understand what you are getting at and I also know that you did do what you truly felt was best, but one thing I just ask is that you don't say to her that she was meant to be with her parents. If she herself feels that way, then let her express that to you - it is HER decision to decide where she was meant to be. <br /><br />One thing that sometimes happens with adoptees is that we aren't always allowed to be the same cantankerous, stroppy, argumentative children/adults that biologically raised people are allowed to be - we are expected to be more compliant - sometimes we are expected to act as if we owe our parents (all of them) more than other children do their parents. All I ask is that you let your child be who they are, that you listen to them and don't invalidate their feelings.cnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18367023828565958.post-37714189499080338282011-05-19T15:40:20.561-07:002011-05-19T15:40:20.561-07:00Thank you for sharing your story with us.
www.rebe...Thank you for sharing your story with us.<br />www.rebeccabany.com<br />http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/becbanyMemoirs of Me & Minehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14366737473619508232noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18367023828565958.post-85381190714892060722010-08-20T20:18:48.179-07:002010-08-20T20:18:48.179-07:00Thank you for sharing your beautiful story Jill!Thank you for sharing your beautiful story Jill!Lechellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06269950945901115240noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18367023828565958.post-70895388673293395002010-08-11T08:11:23.429-07:002010-08-11T08:11:23.429-07:00Anonymous: I'm sorry it has been so difficult...Anonymous: I'm sorry it has been so difficult for you. I hope that my children will not experience the same turmoil knowing that they were adopted. <br /><br />My husband and I are trying our best to raise our children (4 years old, 2 years, and 9 months) to know they were adopted; to personally know their birth families through visits, letters, and pictures; and to know how much they are loved by us and their birth families. <br /><br />There will never be "the day" we told our children they were adopted. We talk about their birth families all the time. We have pictures of them spending time with their birth families in our scrapbooks. I can't imagine how you felt that day when you were told something as important as that; I think I would have been shocked to know that my parents would keep that information from me. I think it would be extremely difficult to not know anything about your birthparents.<br /><br />My children know they are loved by their birth families. I hope my children know that we love them even though we didn't conceive them. We couldn't have them any other way and I wouldn't change the fact that they were adopted. When we look at our children we do not see "an adopted child." We see our children, whom we love dearly. My husband and I are so thankful for our children AND for our birthmoms. They are a part of our family.<br /><br />I do feel our children were meant to be conceived and loved by their birthmoms. I do also feel that we were meant to be chosen as their adoptive parents and to be able to love them as their parents. I pray my children will always love and cherish their birthmoms but to always love and cherish me too as their mom. <br /><br />That's why we love open adoptions and our wonderful birthmoms.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06494145065599651805noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18367023828565958.post-15014154543350805712010-08-10T22:37:04.472-07:002010-08-10T22:37:04.472-07:00Anonymous, I am so sorry that adoption was a traum...Anonymous, I am so sorry that adoption was a traumatic thing for you, but I hope you can understand that for many people, it is a blessing rather than a curse. <br /><br />And I firmly believe that my baby was meant to be with her parents, and there's not a thing you or anyone else can say or do to convince me otherwise.Jill Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00077847438322979630noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18367023828565958.post-33407707239576125742010-08-02T14:55:57.931-07:002010-08-02T14:55:57.931-07:00If she was meant to be theirs they would have conc...If she was meant to be theirs they would have conceived her. I always wonder if the women who relinquish have any comprehension of how much their children want them? I remember the day my parents told me I was adopted. The ground opened up and swallowed me. I wanted my mother and became panicked. That was the day my anxiety disorder started.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com